How to de-stress your sex-life

Do you feel that stress is squeezing the fun out of your bedroom life?

If yes, then you can bring back the action, courtesy tips provided by sex educator and relationship expert Dr. Yvonne Kristin Fulbright. According to the expert, many couples become frustrated, even panicky, when their sex lives go to the wayside during stressful times. When it comes to the factor that governs a person's sex life, it's personality, reports Fox News.

Fulbright says that how an individual's sex life fares depends on whether he tries to get closer to his partner in tragic times or wants to be totally alone and if he's the withdrawing sorts, then it can create misunderstandings in the relationship.

In order to avoid any such misunderstandings and still keep sex life full of fun and passion, Fulbright has suggested that couples need to establish a common ground and mutual understanding during stressful times.

Also, they should make an effort to stay connected during life's highs and lows, because if they don't, it could lead to dire consequences. And in case, sex is not on mind and also the time to be spent in the sack is less, then a person can try the following:

1. Showing appreciation for one another. Giving compliments, for example, is a simple way of expressing affection and letting your partner know that he or she is still being noticed and loved.

2. Talking daily. Chat during dinner or at bedtime. Conversations foster bonding by providing support. It's also important for couples to check in with each other, showing concern and care for one another's well-being with simple statements like, "Tell me about your day."

3. Staying positive . Bite your tongue if you're about to complain. Stressful situations are hard enough to deal with. Don't add to it if you can avoid doing so.

4. Believing in your future together. Stressful times can make lovers doubt their ability to stay together for the long haul. Insecurity issues that arise can only make matters more difficult. Making plans is one way to indicate that you're feeling secure about your future.

5. Helping each other with responsibilities . Approaching tasks with a team effort provides a greater sense of being in 'this' together.

6. Balancing 'alone time' and 'together time.' Create a sensual atmosphere, for example, soothing scents, dim lights, delicious food, and relaxing music to help you unwind.

7. Getting creative in how you'll be intimate . Redefine your definition of sexual intimacy when needed; try a simple body massage.

Not to forget, lovers should make it a point to give in to one another's requests for intimacy whenever possible, as it might just prove to be a big stress-buster. In fact, sex has many physical and emotional benefits, which may help in boosting your desire for more sex and emotional intimacy. Sex can easily take your mind off of your worries.

Also, patience is the key to get your sex life back on track. One should make sure that your relationship, in general, doesn't get neglected.

Sex-guide According To Your Age

Our sexual behavior varies at different times in our lives. Sex guru Tracey Cox in her bestselling book, 'Sextasy' reveals the sexual urges and traits of lovers according to their age...

20-something
Most guys just can't stop dreaming about sex every couple of hours. At this age, girls are usually rebellious in their sexual imaginations. They share same-sex fantasies or want to try out bi-sexuality. A 2006 study of nearly 2000 people discovered that 76 per cent of women who slept with women reached orgasm (for women with men, the figure stands at 50 per cent).
The 20s are the time when young boys and girls are most experimental in their sexual positions. One in 10 people claims Tracey Cox have had a threesome in their early twenties.

Also, people in this age group have most likely visited a strip joint or a lap dancing club - with their friends or their better half.

30 something
The 30s are a time to experiment, almost all 30-somethings claim to have had sex outdoors. Unlike the teens when making out was the most common form of sexual experimentation, most 30 somethings prefer having sex somewhere semi-public like the beach, in the garden or on a park bench in the darkness. There's something wildly erotic about these sexapades! Also, high on the 30 something popularity chart are having sex in the shower or in the bath tub.

Kinky pleasures also rate high as most 30 plus couples claim to be giving in to their fantasies of bondage, blindfolds and spanking on a weekend of debauchery.
This is also the time when women are most likely to befriend gay male pals. Straight women love gay men; gay men love straight women. Swedish research is confirming just why the two groups get along so famously - they both have symmetrical brains. Straight men and lesbians have asymmetrical brain hemispheres.

The 30s also mark the arrival of children in a married couple's life, so the sex drive naturally dwindles. But, Cox points out that during pregnancy, couples have sex four to five times a month. Most put the brakes on their sex lives for about seven weeks after delivery, but four months later are back to four or five times of sex a month. Cox says six months after delivery, the average couple goes back to having sex three to five times a month. But incase you don't fit the bill, remember getting disheartened ain't gonna help. Remember it's just a temporary period, so continue touching and cuddling and if your baby robs you of chances to have sex, indulge in quickies.

Most women says Cox in her book experience higher orgasm rates. Ninety per cent of women past 30 regularly experience orgasm, compared to just 23 per cent of younger women.
40 something
Men in their 40s are more likely to experience erection problems. Also, this is the age when maximum number of men tend to be unfaithful. Also, men are more compelled in their 40s to watch more porn or indulge in sex chats. Women on the other hand get sexually very demanding, often being attracted to younger men.

If you thought the 40s were about low libido, think again, while 40-somethings maybe having less sex than ever, the thrust has shifted from how many times in a week to an emphasis on better quality. You are more sure of your sexual needs in this age group and thus more likely to insist on passion play as opposed to a mere making out session.